New Beginnings

I wanted to write this blog to encourage you that you can do anything! 

It's been nearly 2 months since I moved down to Exeter to begin my gap year with PAIS England and I’m going to share a bit about how it was moving away from my family who understand and support my Tourette’s, to living with new people who I had never met. 

The weeks leading up to moving away from home were not easy. I faced many new challenges and my tics were worse knowing that change was coming. One of the biggest challenges I faced was getting my hair cut (sounds easy, right?) It was not easy for me. How can something so small be so difficult? I was scared of ticking and something going wrong, scared of the scissors and the noise that they make and overall, was nervous to walk into a salon and trust someone who does not know my tics to cut my hair. However, I overcame my fears and let the amazing Millie (from Darpo) do her job! Sometimes it's the little things that we struggle with but when we face our fears and step out of our comfort zones we often get a positive outcome! It doesn't matter how small or big your fears are, they are still valid, but remember that you can do anything!

Joining PAIS meant that not only was I leaving my family and friends for the year, but I was also moving away from three amazing Churches that have helped me to grow and build a strong foundation in my faith. I've found that most people in Church have been accepting towards my tourette's and have supported me throughout my journey. Leaving my comfort zone and moving away from my safe space was pretty scary and I was nervous to have to explain my Tourette’s to new people.  However, since moving to the Church here in Exeter, I have been welcomed and accepted. No one has commented on my tics and the Church have been very understanding towards my tics. I’m really grateful for the Church and area I have been placed in. For me, the environment I’m in really affects me, but being in a positive environment here and finding people I can speak to and relate to has been really helpful. Even though I’ve not found anyone else here with Tourette’s, the support from everyone has been beyond what I could have asked for. If there is something you are struggling with, please speak to people and let them know how they can help you. People are generally very open to listen and provide support where necessary. 

Moving away wasn’t easy though. I struggle to adapt to change and I’ve found that my tics have been worse whilst being here in Exeter. I’ve also developed a lot of new tics which has been quite a challenge for me. However, one thing that I’ve found really useful is finding an outlet for when my tics are bad! I find it really useful to draw, play my guitar and take time for myself. I want to encourage you to find a creative outlet for yourself! Whether you have Tourette’s or not it’s important to have time for yourself and relax. 

I’ve also faced some new experiences whilst being here too. In my first couple of weeks here we went on a trip to the beach. Something that I’ve always struggled with is sand. The texture, the feeling and the sensation is a real struggle for me. However, that evening I found myself walking on the sand and going in the sea. Yes it was a struggle, but it felt really good to face my fear. I’ve also been going shopping weekly with my team. I hate shopping. People often stare at me and laugh at my tics, I worry that my legs will start ticking and I’ll be stuck and I find the experience quite stressful. However, I’m slowly getting used to it and I’m trying not to let my fears stop me from doing the weekly shopping! 

I hope this has helped you to know that you can do anything that you set your mind on! Try not to focus on what other people think of you. I always worry what people think of me when I’m ticking. Will people laugh at me? Do people think my tics are weird? It’s important to remember that we all have our own struggles that we face, so don’t judge people, you don’t know what they are going through!

Finally, if we don't try new things and put new things to the test then we don't know how we will feel when facing our fears! So go and face your fears and try something new!